Don’t be a Flake

Twinks seem to be the biggest flakes. People who drink a lot or party are a close second regardless of age. The former I think is simply selfishness, insecurity and a large dose of immaturity. Some people may be flakes and don’t even realize they are one. So, what is a flake? I put together a brief list of behaviors I’ve experienced over the years that hold agreement among other players about what constitutes a flake. Doing these things will rightfully earn you the FLAKE label so don’t do them.

  • The classic, saying you’re on your way but not showing up without even letting the guy know you’ve changed your mind
  • Changing your mind at the last minute
  • Being deceptive and dishonest
  • Not reading his profile before chatting with him
  • Being ignorant about PreP, TasP, or lying about your status
  • Not sharing your cell phone/text number
  • Asking 20 questions like what are you into, how big is your dick, etc.. If you’re serious it should take no more than 5-10 back and forth text messages
  • Don’t go online if you’re not serious about hooking up now. If your app has a status option make sure it’s set to Not Looking if you do go online
  • Setting up or accepting a play date and then canceling at the last moment without an offer to make it up and rescheduling
  • Stringing a guy along and while you look for something better
  • Posting photos older than a year. I know one guy that’s used the same profile pic for more than 10 years
  • Not using your own picture (I hate you!)
  • Failure to disclose in your profile or in your first moments of chat that you cannot host or that you do not have transportation (bus, walking or bicycles don’t count unless they’re reliable and you’re close to him)
  • Not cleaning out or doing any prep (like trimming fingernails) before looking
  • Lying about whether you PNP or have been
  • Showing up with a cold, cold sores, undisclosed injuries,
  • Not bringing your own supplies. If fisting that means bringing your own lube, poppers and if your require gloves, bringing your own

Unfortunately FLAKES don’t wear a label nor do they post their flakey status on their profiles. It’s hard to know when you’ve run across one, but there are tell-tale signs. In my next post I tell you how to spot them.

Pack a Play Bag for Grab & Go Hook-ups

I was working my ass on the StairMaster last night in anticipation of attending a fisting party in San Francisco.  San Francisco is about an hour and a half drive from where I live. Once I leave home and jump on to the freeway it’s a little too late to think about what I might have forgotten to bring. I’ve resolved that concern by keeping a well-stocked play bag. It’s not only great for long distance dates; it’s also handy for those last minute hookups. All I have to do is grab it and run. It’s gotten quite a bit of use lately and I know I have to restock a few items. As I was running through the inventory in my mind it dawned on me that some of you might be interested in what I pack so that you can put your own play bag together. I have two basic packing lists for fisting; one for long distance travel when I’m going to be gone for a while, and one for short trips like the ones I take into San Francisco. You can adapt the list to accommodate your own special needs for whatever kinks you’re into.

Long Distance Travel

  • Vice grips—I use them for taking shower heads off in hotels so I can hook up my shower diverter and clean-out hose
  • Masking tape—I used it to pad the teeth on the vice grips so I don’t tear up the shower nozzle when I’m taking it off
  • Plumbers tape—I use this for making a water-tight seals on the shower diverter and when I replace the shower nozzle
  • Screw driver with interchangeable tips—I use it to remove shower drains in hotel showers
  • Lube—Both for fucking and fisting of course
  • Clean-out Hose and nozzle
  • Pads—Piddle pads like those you can buy in pet stores
  • Paper towels—Usually not a full roll as it wouldn’t fit in my bag
  • Poppers—including a backup bottle or two
  • Towel (small)
  • Snacks
  • Camera (or cell phone with camera/video ability)
  • Gloves—I grab three sandwich bags and use a marker to label them S, M and L. The I stock them with about what I think I will need
  • Nail file & clippers
  • Condoms
  • Toys
  • Cock rings
  • Dawn dish detergent
  • Leather gear
  • Mini-tripod—For use with my cell phone just in case he’s into filming the action too

Short Distance & Local Travel

  • Lube
  • Hose and nozzle in case there’s a place I can touch up if I need to
  • Pads—Piddle pads like those you can buy in pet stores
  • Poppers—including a backup bottle or two
  • Towel (small)
  • Snacks
  • Camera (or cell phone with camera/video ability)
  • Gloves
  • Condoms
  • Cock rings
  • Leather gear—I’m not referring to a full set of leathers, but I like to wear a jock, combat boots and arm bans on occasion

How about you? Do you have any suggestions to add to these lists?